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All was well and good but for the first time in many years i dont work in London .. this may or may not be a factor – it could just be that everything that happens not irregularly will have its moment. The thing that over the years that has happened not irregularly is the late night train sleeping. For many years on my phone and then somewhere along the line a mixture of getting sloppy or cocky meant that was no longer a regularly adopted safety net.
Unlike when i worked in parliament and awoke to find myself on route (with all chances to avoid this fait behind me) to the city of Cambridge. I did not live in Cambridge at the time, ive never lived in Cambridge or anywhere close to Cambridge) .. Unlike those time recent times have seen a spate of better … not judgement – fortune. Not this time, the body had maybe unlearnt the rhythm and timings of the journey. Worse than this, having woken up two stops and about 10 minutes before my own, i opted for one more nap. It was a poor none-choice, a dereliction of choice and embracing of misplaced instinct.
I awoke and found myself on route and wondered where too.. sometimes you just know the pitch black world beyond the window just isnt the right kind of pitch black, its a pitch black belonging to a world of the less familiar. Id been studying the black pensively as the train pulled in to the big reveal station, it was not my station, it was not a station before my station.. it was a problem.
The side routes were pitch black, it was morning – not yet but it was last train of the night late and there was no sign of any taxi. Because inanimate objects understand comedy timing my phone new this was its time, announcing its lower power with some familiar beeps before bypassing the customary lower power period and shutting itself down. Days, months, sat within a pocket, recalling the moments of gravity induced escape, livid with the disrespect shown for its years of solid service and waiting. Waiting for the right moment to act.
No Taxis – not one was by the station and none passed by as i wondered in the direction of home, waiting for a choice to present itself.. after a while of choices not presenting themselves, i was by the A1 the one road that went the right way and came with probable road lighting. A roundabout, a lack of choices accompanied by a lulling lack of traffic and a number of unresolved questions in my head… the wisdom of the option that looked destined to come.
I was pretty sure this was not a not allowed thing-it was the A part not the M part – not a motorway and therefore ok for night time idiots who sleep on trains and day time old people seeking notoriety on their mobility scooters.
Still it didnt come with a pavement – it came with a certain amount of excess space – a semi-hard shoulder and some grassy patches that had had no reason for pruning, it was spring, there had been rain and there had been warm, it was lush and it was springing forth. Still it was for the best – imaging what this would have been in the cold, wet and even darker of winter.. no, if the time was to come to remind on the perils of alcohol haze train-ing without a safety net, then it couldn’t have happened on a much kinder night than this.
Some cars and lorrys swept past, moving off to the fast lane as if i were far wider of more weaving than i know to be true while a couple opted for the helpful beeping – solidarity or not.
While the UK troops toward deliberate, expertly planned and impeccably implemented exit stage left? right? …um .. the world cup is almost upon us. and my current work contract has (for the most part) come to an end.
Recent times have consisted of:
I also took a trip up north to finish a discussion – there were options for the summer but nothing overly clear, hence the trip up north to locate a brother and ascertain more clarity.
The question was there something beyond the initial talk and intentions and if there was, then which option?
With one of us coming up on an extensive student summer holiday and the other drawing a short term employment contract to its end – the opportunity for a more adventurous turn was there in a way it might not often be again.
Due my own views the main outcome is much more than disappointing and a shock if not a surprise.. In that you can expect a thing but still find yourself in sense of shock when it does precisely that.
The other outcome is less disappointing but potentially more telling. Leave have won, so the attention has turned to the profound, wide spread and deliberate lies and opportunistic tub thumping that they used to achieve this end… the end regardless of the road that got them there.
The idea then comes around that:
a) These people are to blame for the outbursts of the deeply unpleasant, offensive and ignorant views..
b) The legitimacy of the result is questioned.. called into question due to the size and number of lies that built the road that took us here.
The second of these is massively disappointing because the point of all this pain was to say clearly what the will of the people was and because above all things this was always going to happen. It was not reserved to the exit campaign to exaggerate, lie and use unfounded rhetoric and certainty of truth formed upon their lies .. both did it .. so we were guaranteed to end up with a situation where whomever lost will not have felt duly beaten but rather they were doomed by these antics to feel instead cheated.
This view that everything is an opportunity in the pursuit of power and personal advantage undermined the campaign in so many ways .. The electorate no longer believes anything anyone says, wont be led or advised by those who can be given no benefit of the doubt in being honest or in representing their interests ..
THE REMAIN CHAMPION
THE EXIT CHAMPION ??
So what do you do now that you’ve manufactured a situation where no one will rest on the result.. You stand aside and leave it to other to resolve, to say things like heal the wounds, bring people together but people didnt loose, least thats no how they see it … they feel cheated .. Before the result was know and remain was believed to be the outcome it was clear some exit leaders were not going to be prepared to accept the result – now its clear the young, the people of Scotland and London, the people who want anything but to move forward with this outcome feel violated and robbed rather than beaten .. and its a problem
A problem which could continue it corrosive repercussion beyond this already seismic moment..
The people never blame themselves for their choices – so who will be blamed when the deal our representatives cant deliver everything they we’re promised with none of the costs they feel they wont need to pay …
What happens when the working conditions and employment opportunities of the already poor and oppressed dwindle and worsen ..
What happens when funding to the services they were told would be bolstered by not making contributions are actually cut to meet the demands of a shrinking economy and the political response to lower tax and protect that part of the economy .. someone always has to pay ..
What happens when Scotland decides it would rather be in a union with all of Europe rather than a lump of land to its south its long held with limited regard … and with whom it voted recently to stick with based on arguments that staying in the UK meant staying in the EU, when it very clearly now means quite the obvious ..
What happens to the lack of belief, the anger and disaffection then ? – let alone those like me who are and see themselves as European and feel horrified to be identified with with this small mentality, this damaging corrosive retrograde decision of our fellow island dwellers.
So what is this .. i was there and im not sure ..
Was it a demonstration against the result to claim a right to not uphold this outcome?
Was it a demonstration against the falsehoods that got us here? (& would have got us there had the result gone the other way)
Was it a demonstration to friends abroad that what has come to pass does not represent us all and this is not in our name?
I would like nothing more than to see this result turned around but i was not there to protest for this, for i fear that regardless of the historically damaging turning point that was this decision – it could yet be more scaring and dangerously undermining to seek to re-write a vote… People wont accept they were lied to until late, to use that now will see them feel utterly cheated and we will be at least as divided .. its quite the horrendous mess
In the meantime we have people chanting slogans like EU we love you at the demo .. how helpful is that? in most EU countries the EU is far from a popular establishment, indeed the suspicion is that similar referendums in other member states would render the same result as in the UK.
This is an organisation with a massive democratic deficit, that takes money from us all and hands vast amounts of it to wealthy land owners, subsidies vast food waste including failing year after year to address its policies that encouraged fisherman to through excess dead catches overboard .. an orgganisation that has never in all its history managed to have its accounts signed off by its auditors and yet invades the democracies of nation states … Yes we are better of in the EU, but we would all be better of, maybe not in this position and maybe not in worse positions in years to come if those pro-EU had done something real about its offensive and unnecessary short comings.
Instead we have political and media seeking to set an agenda and telling people what to think (though not a consistent message)
We have a people who when asked prefer to act out, responding in petulant rebellion, thus fueling increased mistrust by the ruling bubble, decreasing engagement while increasing populist rhetoric, decreasing trust and alignment and increasing petulant rebellion when eventually consulted and round and round …
I admit to not providing a solution but surely it cant come from further alienating the electorate, the politicians are the fewer, the more able to communicate and make a collective change than are the masses – for that reason above all others the onus is on them … but we all hold individual responsibility .. Those who opt to be ignorant and racist are not ignorant and racist because of what has happened, those reason lie elsewhere and deserve their own attention. Those who stoke are not innocent but they are the creators of a far deeper illness
Jame’s have a concert – one friend is a big fan .. end up going – not many familiar tunes are plates but its nice enough.
Nottingham – its further north than i had in mind .. and the work meetings that were in Nottingham in my head were in Mansfied in not my head .. another 20 miles or so up the way .. a place quite light on Hotel and accommodation options
Discovering Airbnb – a concept that still seems odd to me, where people surrender their home to invading persons – in this case myself, in return for donation .. just like the British preferred to do things – back in the day ..
This is Nottingham – Manfied devoid of options – or rather its Sherwood a particular area within the general Nottingham city area.
The EU debate continues .. salient
Airbnb places aside the following week – return to Nottingham, via booking.com a traditional accommodation – Hotel .. The Stage Hotel .. which according to the stars of quality rates a respectable 3* …
As we approached the comment was offered that is had something about it, something in its character, a sort of crack den or whore house quality .. inside the improvement was questionable in the communal areas though the room was less.. well it was less .. i did wake with a face skin inflammation that had not been there the evening before .. who can say whether it was a bite or another swiftly occurring blemish .. who can say, but there it was and time for another day of Mansfield meeting.
It was an unconventional interpretation of the 3* conceit
The evening before Liverpool collapses in the UEFA cup final – a second half performance that can clearly be said to number among the worst or biggest collapses seen in finals .. Better nights have been had, in summary.
The EU debate / Tory Civil War … continues ..
The conservative parties internal debate and point of schizophrenic break .. The EU .. brought unto the population as a whole to overcome their trauma.
While a legitimate point of debate for a country its swiftly descended into farcical spoutings of the highly outlandish and absolutest kind… while the public demand facts – but what facts – what guarantees are they seeking ?
Economic facts about what will happen in the future?
Population growth and distribution patterns in the future?
Speed and nature of political agreements in the future?
There are no facts there are only suppositions, notions, opinions and some well and some poorly grounded predictions.
Still it gives those with racists tendencies to loiter safely in the shadow of those with more practical and a less malignant existence – its become unacceptable to say some people who say not quite borderline racist utterances are racists.. no they are people with genuine and legitimate concerns .. people who suggest Britain’s place in the world has altered this its blood letting days of empire, innovation and bright exploration .. they dont believe in the UK, they are self hating brits – shame be upon them … Yes its a quality debate ..
and when its all well and done many things will have been thrown about and probably everyone on either side will feel cheated, lied to and less debating a fountain of things that weren’t … no one will believe the outcome is the will of the people regardless of what that outcome is ..
Boris..ex Major or London..so unsure which way to go..Leave / Remain..up to the last, NOW converted to lead advocate and devout leaver… Teller of the things about how the EU foists banana controls upon us and diminishes our great light, casting us into their great sinking darkness.
Cameron .. least fit for office PM of UK … so unsure which way to go up until after the phantom renegotiation .. NOW converted to lead remain campaigner and no-er of the country destroying ills that come of leaving.
Then there was a marathon .. none participatory .. wouldn’t even make it the one mile.. not even close
Not quite the US republican debate .. at which its still some some small relief to see even right winger of Europe seemly shocked and appalled .. but that doesn’t stop the Government reverting to .. vote for us – the other guy is a muslim & well you know what that means … campaign .. A new low invading a mainsteam political party who ought to take their responsibility more seriously and no better than to attempt such opportunism..
Thankfully it effectively killed of their campaign – London – no place for this sort of thing and guaranteed their own candidates demise.